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General Forum / Some help for the ladies of OTB!
« on: March 13, 2008, 07:37:30 am »
In light of some of our OTB ladies' confusion on their role in society, I have decided to post some tips to help you all out. I understand that being a woman automatically disadvantages you in life and I am here to help!! These tips should help you all succeed at your one true purpose in life...being a better wife. No need for thanks, just knowing that I may have helped even one of you better understand your role in a relationship is all the thanks I need!
How to be the Perfect Wife.
GET YOUR WORK DONE
Plan your tasks with an eye on the clock. Finish or interrupt them an hour before he is expected. Your anguished cry, "Are you home already?" is not exactly a warm welcome.
HAVE DINNER READY
Plan ahead, even the night before to have a delicious meal, on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.
PREPARE YOURSELF
Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. This will also make you happy to see him instead of too tired to care. Turn off the worry and be glad to be alive and grateful for the man who is going to walk in. While you are resting you can be thinking about your Fascinating Womanhood assignment and all you can do to make him happy and give his spirits a lift. When you arise, take care of your appearance. Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.
CLEAR AWAY THE CLUTTER
Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. in a bucket or wastebasket and put them in the back bedroom for sorting later. Then run a dustcloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift too. Having the house in order is another way of letting him know that you care and have planned for this homecoming.
PREPARE THE CHILDREN
Take just a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small) comb their hair, and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them look the part.
MINIMIZE ALL NOISE
Especially give heed to this if your husband has to join rush hour traffic. At the time of his arrival eliminate noise of washer, dryer, dishwasher or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet at the time of their father's arrival. Let them be a little noisy beforehand to get it out of their system.
BE HAPPY TO SEE HIM
Greet him with a warm smile and act glad to see him. Tell him that it is good to have him home. This may make his day worthwhile. If there is any romance left in you, he needs it now.
SOME DON'TS
* Don't greet him with problems and complaints. Solve the problems you can before he gets home and save those you must discuss with him until later in the evening.
* Also, don't complain if he is late for dinner. Count this as a minor problem when compared with what he might have gone through that day.
* Don't allow the children to rush at him with problems or requests. Allow them to briefly greet their father but save demands for later.
MAKE HIM COMFORTABLE
Have him lean back into a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to massage his neck and shoulders and take off his shoes. Don't insist on this however. Turn on music if it is one of his pleasures. Speak in a soft, soothing, pleasant voice. Allow him to relax - to unwind.
LISTEN TO HIM
You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first, then he will be a more responsive listener later.
MAKE THE EVENING HIS
Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and to relax. If he is cross or irritable, never fight back. Again, try to understand his world of strain.
THE GOAL
Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit. Then add to this the application of all the principles of Fascinating Womanhood and your husband will want to come home. He will rather be with you than with anyone else in the world and will spend whatever time he can possibly spare with you. Try living all of these rules for his homecoming and see what happens. This is the way to bring a man home to your side, not by pressure, persuasion or moral obligation.
This was taken from Helen B. Andelin's Fascinating Womanhood, published by Pacific Press in 1965. The course was designed to teach women how to be happy in marriage and is even more relevant in these trying times.
How to be the Perfect Wife.
GET YOUR WORK DONE
Plan your tasks with an eye on the clock. Finish or interrupt them an hour before he is expected. Your anguished cry, "Are you home already?" is not exactly a warm welcome.
HAVE DINNER READY
Plan ahead, even the night before to have a delicious meal, on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.
PREPARE YOURSELF
Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. This will also make you happy to see him instead of too tired to care. Turn off the worry and be glad to be alive and grateful for the man who is going to walk in. While you are resting you can be thinking about your Fascinating Womanhood assignment and all you can do to make him happy and give his spirits a lift. When you arise, take care of your appearance. Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.
CLEAR AWAY THE CLUTTER
Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. in a bucket or wastebasket and put them in the back bedroom for sorting later. Then run a dustcloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift too. Having the house in order is another way of letting him know that you care and have planned for this homecoming.
PREPARE THE CHILDREN
Take just a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small) comb their hair, and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them look the part.
MINIMIZE ALL NOISE
Especially give heed to this if your husband has to join rush hour traffic. At the time of his arrival eliminate noise of washer, dryer, dishwasher or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet at the time of their father's arrival. Let them be a little noisy beforehand to get it out of their system.
BE HAPPY TO SEE HIM
Greet him with a warm smile and act glad to see him. Tell him that it is good to have him home. This may make his day worthwhile. If there is any romance left in you, he needs it now.
SOME DON'TS
* Don't greet him with problems and complaints. Solve the problems you can before he gets home and save those you must discuss with him until later in the evening.
* Also, don't complain if he is late for dinner. Count this as a minor problem when compared with what he might have gone through that day.
* Don't allow the children to rush at him with problems or requests. Allow them to briefly greet their father but save demands for later.
MAKE HIM COMFORTABLE
Have him lean back into a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to massage his neck and shoulders and take off his shoes. Don't insist on this however. Turn on music if it is one of his pleasures. Speak in a soft, soothing, pleasant voice. Allow him to relax - to unwind.
LISTEN TO HIM
You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first, then he will be a more responsive listener later.
MAKE THE EVENING HIS
Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and to relax. If he is cross or irritable, never fight back. Again, try to understand his world of strain.
THE GOAL
Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit. Then add to this the application of all the principles of Fascinating Womanhood and your husband will want to come home. He will rather be with you than with anyone else in the world and will spend whatever time he can possibly spare with you. Try living all of these rules for his homecoming and see what happens. This is the way to bring a man home to your side, not by pressure, persuasion or moral obligation.
This was taken from Helen B. Andelin's Fascinating Womanhood, published by Pacific Press in 1965. The course was designed to teach women how to be happy in marriage and is even more relevant in these trying times.
4
General Forum / OMFG...no...really...OMFG
« on: January 31, 2008, 09:18:51 am »
NSFW for some of you losers who work in uptight fascist office's. No nudity...but...well...words won't do this justice.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cw7agenDMcU
All you women should do whatever it takes to look like that. I am planning on chloroforming my wife and shipping her off to a plastic surgeon to perfectly emulate this.
I'm also planning on chloroforming Xir and taking him in as well. It is going to be great to look over at his desk and see THAT every day.
Hell..I might get the surgery myself so I can gaze in the mirror all day and touch myself...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cw7agenDMcU
All you women should do whatever it takes to look like that. I am planning on chloroforming my wife and shipping her off to a plastic surgeon to perfectly emulate this.
I'm also planning on chloroforming Xir and taking him in as well. It is going to be great to look over at his desk and see THAT every day.
Hell..I might get the surgery myself so I can gaze in the mirror all day and touch myself...
5
General Forum / WTB Orange slices and some fetal spooning...
« on: January 24, 2008, 07:00:57 pm »6
General Forum / ITT we praise Snow...
« on: December 19, 2007, 07:24:15 pm »
..as the prodigy he was!
7
General Forum / ITT link your favorite music vids
« on: December 12, 2007, 08:35:32 am »
I'll start with some of my usda approved choice cuts:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfHlA3fmJG0 Snow White is Hawt.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vp9z-9RdwwM A Man is Burning
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiTNXhIFVrw Fat Suits and chicks making out FTW!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHWicNDkbpw Tastes Like Burning
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ML-CE_GDxnE Huh. Something about this video gets a rise outa me..not sure why...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9MFrRyfQek He Kicked me in the Jimmie!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdRd3k4CIAg WAKE UP!!!
More to come at a yet to be determined date.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfHlA3fmJG0 Snow White is Hawt.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vp9z-9RdwwM A Man is Burning
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiTNXhIFVrw Fat Suits and chicks making out FTW!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHWicNDkbpw Tastes Like Burning
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ML-CE_GDxnE Huh. Something about this video gets a rise outa me..not sure why...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9MFrRyfQek He Kicked me in the Jimmie!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdRd3k4CIAg WAKE UP!!!
More to come at a yet to be determined date.
8
General Forum / For those that enjoyed George R. Martin’s A Song of Fire and Ice saga...
« on: November 20, 2007, 12:53:56 pm »
...I strongly recommend R. Scott Baker’s Prince of Nothing trilogy.
I am on the third book now and it is incredible.
That is all.
I am on the third book now and it is incredible.
That is all.
10
General Forum / I just Godwin'd my own thread on the first post!!! NSFW!!!!
« on: November 05, 2007, 02:12:34 pm »
Discuss.
14
General Forum / Dive videos from Bonaire
« on: September 24, 2007, 09:33:03 am »
Here are the links to my dive videos from Bonaire. These are actually abridged versions, the entire videos are much longer (1 hour dives edited to around 35-40 minutes...) but these are nice little compilations of a couple of dives.
http://blennylips.com/
Choose the Salt Pier and Atlantis dives as those are ours. (can't direct link to the videos...)
I shaved my head for the trip so it is a little hard to tell me and my buddy apart. I am the one with hair actually growing back as my buddy is bald ^_^
For further distinguishing features, my mask band is blue, his is black, as is his mask. He is also the bigger of the two of us.
These were some incredible dives. The diving in Bonaire is pristine and the top spot in the world for shore diving. The guy who's site that is and who filmed us has an incredible house. It is right on the water with its own dive spot, open air living area, incredible pool, etc. He even has a few iguanas that hang around. If you are considering taking up diving, Bonaire is the place to do it. We will be making many returns to this diving Mecca.
http://blennylips.com/
Choose the Salt Pier and Atlantis dives as those are ours. (can't direct link to the videos...)
I shaved my head for the trip so it is a little hard to tell me and my buddy apart. I am the one with hair actually growing back as my buddy is bald ^_^
For further distinguishing features, my mask band is blue, his is black, as is his mask. He is also the bigger of the two of us.
These were some incredible dives. The diving in Bonaire is pristine and the top spot in the world for shore diving. The guy who's site that is and who filmed us has an incredible house. It is right on the water with its own dive spot, open air living area, incredible pool, etc. He even has a few iguanas that hang around. If you are considering taking up diving, Bonaire is the place to do it. We will be making many returns to this diving Mecca.
15
General Forum / Oakley pics
« on: September 22, 2007, 09:23:35 am »
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00931.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00936.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00945.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00938.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00906.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00921.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00905.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00896.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00878.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00936.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00945.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00938.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00906.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00921.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00905.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00896.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/griffdog/DSC00878.jpg
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